Grieving the lost of a soul sister

Broken, torn, battered, bruise I am not sure which words to use. Angry, hurt, feeling confuse that’s how you left me what I got the news. Thinking to myself why do they have to be that way, trying hard to take my joy away but the confirmation came and there was no denying the pain. To numb to feel, too weak to move until I heard someone speak your name. Tears roll down my face as I try to speak but the only words that came out was “lord, why her”? I search my mind for why God chose you, a million thoughts but none of them can explain why it had to be you, the reason for my pain. 
You have gone to the great beyond, home to the father’s land and left me in this world all alone. With sadness in my heart I have to say I will miss you till that day when the trumpets will sound at the gates of heaven and you along with papa will be waiting for me at God’s right hand. You were more than just my sister for you were also my best friend and to live with the burden of not knowing when is no easy task but I’ll take refuge in knowing that you are seated at the father’s right hand.

Fantasy

I've always admired Niki and dreamed of fucking her so hard that she would cum all over my face, hands and dildo.
 It was girls’ night out and she came over to my house to get dressed. I've been thinking of how I should come onto her without making it obvious so I plotted to get her drunk and then fuck her senseless when we got back home. I watched as she changed and got into the shower. I stood at the bathroom sink rinsing my mouth after putting my toothbrush away. The thought of Niki and I making love was so fucking sexy that I had a mind orgasm. Chills run through my mind and I found myself playing with my pussy which was already soaking wet. I massaged my clit with my panty still on, wanting more I pushed my panty to the side and dipped a finger in my wetness and damn it came pouring down. Inhaling sharply as my emotions got the best of me I found myself racing with time to find a release. I braced myself against the bathroom sink, with one hand fingering my pussy and the other caressing my nipples as I grind against the sink. Not being able to moan out loud I bit down on my lower lip and allow the feeling to wash over my body.
Just as I was in the process of fixing my towel around me the shower stopped and Niki grabbed her towel from the holder. I watched as she stepped out and I got in secretly smiling to myself.
 Thirty minutes we were dressed and ready to leave the house. Dressed in a black lacy and chiffon cocktail dress, nude pumps, hair swept up in a ban with a few loose curls, light make up and lip color, Niki looked like she'd just stepped out of a fashion magazine. I complimented her on how well she wore the dress and she did the same in return. "There isn't many words that can describe the sexiness you bring to this dress, you will definitely be an eye pleaser especially with that low cut back" said Niki. At the sound of the taxi honking his horn we verified that we had all that we needed and stepped out. Once we were seated, I gave the driver the instructions to where we were going, handed him a 20 dollar bill and relax as my mind played games with me. "Are you alright" I heard Niki ask bringing me back to reality. "Yes, I'm fine, why did you ask"? “Cause you have this mischievous look on your face that just had me wondering". I chuckled lightly and went on to chat about the day’s events. A few minutes later the driver pulled into the drive way, got out and held the door open so we can step out.

 Heads turn as we walked in and exchange pleasantries. We chatted with a few friends before being seated for dinner. At the table we were seated apart but not far away for we found ourselves sitting across from each other. After two glasses of wine I felt a bit tipsy and decided to taste the waters. I removed my right shoe and used my foot to tease Niki. At first contact she almost jumped out of her seat and knock down her glass of wine but no harm was done. "Niki is something wrong?" asked the guy who was seated next to her, No Rick, everything is fine. Just swallowed to quickly". "Just be careful honey" said John. Not being sure if I should do it again I decided to and this time she said nothing but her cheeks turned red. As the night went on, we mingled with friends, drank and partied until it was time to head home. We both looked wasted and didn't speak much on the ride home.

 Once inside I thought of Niki nude in my bed and every part of me was aching to fuck her. Not caring what it would take, right down to rape Niki was going to get fucked tonight. I walked into the living room and there she was sitting on the sofa head bent as she removed her heels. Every moved was graceful with a touch of sexiness. I admired the sight of her and sensing my gaze she looked up and the look on her face was amazing. I walked over to the sofa and asked "can I help you with the zipper?"  "Sure, why not" she replied. What was that all about at the dinner table, Niki asked? I can show you better than I can tell you boo Niki. I have wanted to make love to you from the first time you walked into the office with your sexy ass self, commanding the room like you owned it. I've been meaning to teach you a lesson every since that day. Niki sat there and said nothing as I pulled her zipper down. My mind and emotions were making me a hot mess and I thought to myself "there isn’t any way it’s not happening tonight". Placing light kisses on her neck, tracing the opening of her dress in the back she shivered at the touch of my lips on her bare skin but she said nothing. Lifting the dress from her body I inhaled sharply at the view in front of me. Headlights on, wearing a pink lace thong and fishnet stockings I was ready to play the role of traffic officer. I stretched out my hand, Niki hesitated. "I won't bite you Niki boo; unless it brings you nothing put pleasure". I stood there and waited as she gathered her thoughts after which she reached her hand out to mine.  I walked her over to the dining room area, pulled out a chair and leaned it against the counter. I walked out to the bar area and came back with a few surprise goodies.

 I fixed us a glass of chairman’s, turned on the music and was ready to take it to another level. Niki sat on the chair with her knees pulled up to her chin. Come on babes relax, I'll take care of you. Placing the glass in her hands I asked her to drink and she did, almost emptying the glass. Placing the glass on the counter I pulled Niki to me and kissed her lips, the taste of chairman’s still fresh on them. At first she didn't return the kiss but slowly she began to loosen up and stuck her tongue in my mouth. We shared a few kisses as my hands roamed her body. Taking an ice cube from the glass I traced it around her nipple and licked the droplets of water as it run down her body. I sucked lightly on her right nipple and Niki moaned out loud. Realizing that it turned her on I repeated the gesture to the left breast biting lightly on the nipple this time. Working my way down the length of her body, using an ice cube I caressed her pussy. I felt her clit come to life with every stroke. Stocking and panties still on I began to eat her pussy, nibbling on her clit. I stoop between her legs and her hands were on my head urging me on to give her more. Tell me what you want Niki, she didn't reply. I stopped and stood up, placed my hand under her chin and forced her to look at me. Grabbing her pussy I asked" do you like it when I touch your pussy?" She tried to look away put I wouldn't let her. I will teach you a lesson you cunt. Don't pretend like you can't talk because a few minutes ago you were moaning out loud. Spreading her legs apart I slapped her pussy hard, not expecting this Niki almost jumped from her seat. With the second slap to her pussy she said" I want you to fuck me hard Jen, I want you to make me scream out loud". That's it girl just tell your baby what you need and she will give it to you. Ensuring the she was properly seated I shifted her panty to the side and licked her clit. God lord Jen you're going to make me come. Oh no Niki not yet, I'll tell you when you can cum. Sucking on her clit and fingering her pussy, driving the bitch crazy I know she was nearing an orgasm at that moment I stopped and placed my fingers in her mouth so she can taste herself. I pinched her nipples as she licked her wetness off my right finger and they turned red. Giving her breast some attention, I made love to her nipple while fingering her pussy. Wanting more and needing to stick my tongue up her cunt I pulled away. Niki, I need you to get up on the stool and bend over the counter, can you do that for me baby? Not being able to speak the words she nodded her head. With each knee on a stool and Niki bent over the sigh was just fucking mind blowing. I had to stop and admire that work of art before punishing her sexy behind. I took my whip and spanked her butt chicks. She cried out in pain but it was sweet pain. I put the whip away and slapped her butt cheeks with my hands, the markings event. Lightly tapping her pussy, I can see that her clit was a bit swollen from the sucking coupled with the spanking. Ripping the stocking apart in the crouch area, I held on to her thong and pulled it tightly wrapping it around my fingers till it was pressing hard against her pussy, moving it in a upward motion. Niki's moan was loud as she begged me for more. Satisfied that I had tormented her enough I removed her panty and got underneath her so that her pussy was seated directly on my mouth. Sticking my tongue out I licked her pussy, spread her lips apart ensuring I tasted every bit of her sweet cunt. Using the clit vibrator, I placed it on her clit and with my tongue fucking her pussy my baby was ready to cum for me. Not being able to get enough of that good pussy I sucked on her clit till she begged me to stop. Jen I don't know how much more of this I can take, please stop. Did you figure that out Nikis' before or after you had an orgasm because we are just getting warm?

 Moving to stand in front of Niki I asked her to suck on Mr dildo so that he can get nice and wet. Niki sucked him like she was born to so this. Her lips and tongue danced to a beat of its own. Everything about her was done so gracefully that I got an orgasm just looking and enjoying the way she sucked the dildo. Ensuring that he was wet enough after apply some ky gel I entered Niki's wet pussy. With each stroke I teased her using the tip of the dilldo  I play with her clit and pussy lips till she was begging for a deep penetration. Inserting my dick half way in before pulling him out again, giving her just enough to have her beg for more until she had no more self control. Smacking her ass and ramping my dick down her pussy, knocking on her pussy was like an angry cop who came to search in the wee hours of the morning. I was certain that she was getting the fuck of her life. " Oh yes baby, I want more, your dildo feels so good in my pussy" and "more you shall get" I replied.

Shifting positions where Niki's feet was behind her neck I pounded that pussy like it was nobody's business. Feeling her body beginning to tremble and her pussy walls contracting I knew she was near climax. I pulled out the dildo and replaced it with my tongue. Spreading her pussy lips apart I sucked on her clit and inserted four fingers in her pussy hole and fingered her hard. Her soft moans were now loud screams as she squirted all over my face. Licking her pussy, not wanting that good juice to go to waste I was slightly distracted by a noise coming from the entrance of the door and in the corner of my eyes there Troy stood dick in hands, masturbating away while he relived himself of a hot load of semen.

Behind my smile

Behind my smile I hide years of pain. Years of feeling unloved, not wanted and used but many believe that I'm one of the happiest girls alive.
Behind my smile lies a broken human being afraid to love, afraid to commit for history have a way of repeating itself.
Behind my smile I am a dying soul begging to be free, wanting just one person to hear my cries and see my pain but I'm afraid it will be too late before anyone realize what's hidden behind my smile.

Death isn't the enemy

Our love ones depart this earth so quickly. It’s sad that energy and precious time is wasted fighting over pity stuff and making each other's lives miserable. Love while we are still alive, show appreciation when there is a need to, shower each other with kisses, hugs and gifts when one still has the opportunity to appreciate it and give words of encouragement. Praise while we can glory in it for it’s not in death that we should speak kind words and be thoughtful but in living.

Death isn't our enemy because with accepting life we know that one day we must part this earth. The real enemies are the ugly feelings we allow to consume us; greed, hatred, betrayal, selfishness, power, deceit and the list goes on. These are the things that separate us from our love ones, takes away from the time that can be spent together, making beautiful memories so that with death we won't feel cheated and robbed of time that should be shared with the ones we love. Embrace and respect each other, capitalize on every opportunity to be with family and friends and always show love.

As you left

I stood in the balcony and watch as you disappeared around the corner, tears falling from my eyes not caring if the neighbors saw me. I felt numb; I couldn't find the strength to move so I sat down on the steps allowing the feelings that had been bottled inside to flow freely, silent tears became loud sobbing. I wrapped my arms around my shivering body hoping to find some comfort wishing that this would all be a dream.
  I sat there motionless and it felt like everything was frozen in time for the tears wouldn't stop. Not knowing when it had started but as I wiped away the tears that were blurring my vision I felt that my face was wet and so was my hair, my entire body, my clothing soaking from the pouring rain. I felt my hands hurting and looked down to see that my knuckles were almost as white as snow from the length of time that I sat with my fist clenched together.
I try to get up from where I sat while the tears still run down my face, sadness in my heart realizing that even the universe had conspired and was sharing my pain, the reason for the rain.